I knew you where a fighter and you are now living your life freely but with your old memories gone.
"She has just two days to live", the doctor said. His words sucked up from behind me and grabbed my throat.
By the hospital bed.
I was unable to cry because I was choked with my own fear. I stared at her and she smiled back, I was then overwhelmed with selfishness I wasn't ready to let her go.
I went over and sat down beside her, my eyes they met hers, and I saw the emotion in them that had been missing up to that point. Water welled up on the brim of her lids, gliding down her check in slow motion. I encouraged her to stay strong and fight, I knew all hope was lost but I wasn’t ready to feel her absence. She cried and beg for me to move on but I love every bit of her. I held soulfully for the last time and I was willing to say Goodbye.
Letting go.
Goodbye to the times we stay up all night laughing at unnecessary things. Goodbye to your dream of becoming a artist. Goodbye to that perfect smile of yours. Goodbye to all the pains and numerous drugs you had to choke down, you can now rest well. Goodbye to all the silly things we do together. Goodbye to the endless video chats and messages. Goodbye to the countless moment, it was worth the while.
Goodbye to how you cry and that your funny noises. Goodbye to the times we sing along to your favorite song. Goodbye to all the birthdays and Christmas we had together. Goodbye to our dream of being together. Goodbye to the times when I stay all night just to watch you sleep. Goodbye to the imperfect you. I can never forget you for a single minute, didn't grow far from my heart , But in it.
"Am sorry", was all she whispered to me. I held her hand and watched her slip away from me forever. I didn't have any profound words, I just whispered, "Goodbye." I know I will love again, but nobody can replace you in my heart, so am going to carry you every where I go till we meet again.
Breathe again.
Now its two weeks without you, surprisingly I heard you survived, I knew you where a fighter and you are now living your life freely but with your old memories gone. Well I can't wait to meet the new you. I tried sending you letters but I ended up with a blank page. It has been hard on me, I cried sometimes, I don't smile like I used to.
I came by your house today, I realized you where around, my heart beats faster. I clung to you but you shirked away and gave me that astonished look. And it brought back that ache that was deeply rooted and it throbbed into me. I tried shielding that pain but I was still held back. I showed you the memory we made together but your new memory bereaved you from understanding us. I had no choice than to move on.
This is goodbye for real.
I left
This is what love is, a rebirth of hope and the dying of faith.
Written by Karen Nwannukwu.
Karen Nwannukwu is 18. She is a lover of food, fashion, writing and a host of other golden stuffs. She can be best described with one word RESILIENT. A writer expressing her mind, developing a character, with the power of making the character be whoever she wants them to be. Her interest is in expressing herself and wanting to be heard. Link up on social media; Instagram-@muse_belle and @belle__karen Facebook @bellekaren twitter @bellekaren1
Love is… Goodbye – the rebirth of hope and the dying of faith
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